In about ten years, you might see some of this at our house.

You wouldn't know it by looking at my house, but I've put a lot of thought into the interior design of it.

The key word there is THOUGHT. I have put a lot of time in on Personal Internet Research and THOUGHT. I have not purchased or created or painted a DAMN THING.

Partially because I'm a money miser and partially because I don't quite trust myself. I have designed no fewer than four living rooms on Polyvore, and at least that many playrooms, and let's not even talk about what I'm threatening to do to my kitchen cabinets.

I'm terrified to buy furniture that I might later hate. I am not the kind of person who loves painting walls and wants to re-do hers every year. What I do, I am stuck with. It's kind of a big deal, seeing as we'll spend more than $32 on it and we'll have to look at it every day for the rest of my lucid life. Probably. Yes, $32 is my threshold amount for "can I buy it without totally budgeting and dithering about it?" If I need something and it's under $32, I only dither for about a week. Over $32 and we've got IBS on our hands. There is nothing magic about the number 32. I don't usually like to spend $32. But that seems to be the tipping point between rational thinking, like "Of course I have to have diapers - duh" and "Hmm. This bulk deal of diapers is a great deal, but IT COSTS 35 DOLLARS. DO I WANT TO PART WITH 35 DOLLARS RIGHT THIS MINUTE?" Because, what if I need that 35 dollars later? What if that 35 dollars is the difference between repairing our air conditioning and not? How many times this month did I already spend 33 dollars?

So, furniture et al costs more than 32 dollars. Considerably more. And that means I will alternately be constipated and have violent diarrhea until we finally just make a decision already and spend the stupid dollars.

But give me a minute, please, because my bowels just recovered from the purchase of the house.

But, I will share with you a few items I've been toying with, just so you can tell me later that you knew all along I'd hate that yellow fabric, but you didn't have the heart to break it to me at the time. DON'T LET ME SPEND $35 on fabric I will later hate!

I have picked these for pillows and curtains in the play room, and don't ask me what will be what because I don't know. I'v drawn 90 sketches and hate it all.

There will be a futon in that room, and it has a black cover. And there is a half bath off that room with a canary yellow countertop, and that I just cannot fight. So we work with what we have. Also, I have a turquoise locker and a yellow "A/V" cart for moving the old tv/dvd player in and out of there, so we're trying to make all that work together, and then some. Get it?












IF YOU HATE IT, DON'T TELL ME. Wait, do tell me. NO DON'T. I can't start over! I just can't!

Not only does it take me ten times longer to purchase things just because I hate to spend money in general, but I also am ALWAYS. SURE. I can get a better deal. So I find something I like or even love, and then I spend the time normal people would spend watering plants and vacuuming carpets and talking to loved ones scouring the internet for a cheaper facsimile of that thing I love. And then I buy the knock off and I hate it.

For example, I love these drawer pulls for our kitchen, from Restoration Hardware,



but I probably will end up with these, from Home Depot,



which don't really accomplish what I want at all, but whatever, I'll save like $50. And I'll look at them for the next ten years and shake my head, because IT IS NOT REALLY WHAT I WANTED, DAMN THE FIFTY BUCKS.

Anyway, in good news, we got a new dishwasher yesterday. My first stainless steel appliance. Baby steps.